Walk in Truth

As a parent you feel connected to John as he rejoices in his understanding that Gaius is faithfully helping believers implement truth into their lives. I think a lot about the time when my children will have to walk alone and will what I teach them now, abide so closely to their hearts that they will be able to stand and walk in truth. My hope as a mother is that my children will have an influence on society to help many develop a greater understanding of what truth is and how it can uplift and develop a dying world. I want to be a person that exemplifies this desire to teach truth and to promote it wherever I am. So many feel so abandoned by God, that the need for individuals to testify of Christ, His reality, and His involvement in our lives is really pertinent. I feel an intense responsibility to be a teacher and a leader of love. You worry about your "Diotrephes" who get lost in the authoritative power of the priesthood and don't lead with love and loyalty, but stray from the true doctrine that Christ teaches just because they want to be in control. I believe that if you align yourself with the Savior and His teachings, you enable yourself to be in a place to recognize truth and to promote it.

A Last Lecture

My last lecture. Oh boy. It seems so imperfect to ask a twenty nine year old, mother of two, to leave a last lecture for someone else to glean truth from. Sure, I have had experience that merits some sort of recognition, but to actually translate that into my last lecture seems daunting. I suppose there is always that thought in the back of my mind, looming behind the scenes, what are my last words really going to be? What will they remember I told them when I am gone? I came up with a few points I am certain will help direct anyone who chooses to look to me for any sort of helpful advice for future success. I am an organizer, a professional planner who likes checking lists off so I decided to do just that. Maybe one day this list can be edited into some form of publication that my posterity can really use as a life resource.

• Obedience doesn't just please the God of Heaven and Earth, but it builds your true character. For some reason as a child rules are really obnoxious. They get in the way of pleasure. Every day I ask my son what his favorite part of the day was and he, most regularly states, "Um, when I played." It is really what every child is all about. The fun part of life. I have yet to meet a child that says their favorite part of life is all the rules that their parents make for them. Rules get more difficult to follow the older you get, but I can assure you that obedience to those rules will not only keep you protected from the ills of the world, but your confidence is strengthened in order to contribute to the good in the world. Even the smallest rules, that seem insignificant and absurd, fuel the character growing within you. Confidence is something you will need ample supply of as you make tough choices in life. Who to marry, what type of education to get, how you will serve the community, and what type of jobs you will create. Everything starts with someone who knows what they want and who they are. I believe that obedience keeps that person strong, in good moral standing, and pleased with who they are. 
• Money isn't everything. Blake and I are usually having the "one day" conversation where one day we won't be in school, our kids will be older, we will live in a home we own, and the burden and stress of trying to make ends meet will be a faded memory. Usually this conversation also brings about the understanding that what we want most out of life isn't all the toys and fancy lifestyle the "one days" will bring us, but the experiences the "one days" will enable us to have. It almost always brings us back to the experience we are having right now. Who we are without money is amazing us. We are creative, long suffering, humble (sometimes), tired, but excited. We are constantly learning and teaching. We are creating life and teaching those humans how to be people in a world without money and it works. Stress is hard. It gives Blake headaches and it gives my midsection a few extra inches, but it is part of this time in our lives. I imagine it will follow us to the "one days" as well and peak it's face into the walls of our home in unexpected ways, but we are learning how to handle it and it's not by throwing money at it. We are working out our problems, vocally, to each other and the Lord. Our children are learning how to survive without buying something every time we go to the store.Things are still happening for us without having money. So when we have money, and the one days become our nowadays, we want to make sure we remember what no money made. 
• Make choices in your youth that will enable you to be a trustworthy person. Trust will be the most important asset you can have as a businessman, a spouse, and a human. You build trust in yourself and others trust you as you make choices that are good and valiant. These are choices you make with others and more importantly, choices you make when no one is looking. Who are you when no one is around? Trust will secure jobs for you, it will secure your marriage, and it will secure your family. Make sure you can be trusted. The worst feeling in the world is knowing you let people down because you don't have a well of honesty and integrity built up in you. Built up from years as a child that you had to practice being true. If you can have integrity, you will never be alone. The most successful man in the world will never feel success, if he goes home to no one. Loneliness is a hard road to walk. Be someone that can be depended on and trusted in every aspect of your life. 

There is so much more to this. I am still trying to figure it all out. Be kind to everyone. Don't talk bad about your in-laws even if they are aliens from a different planet. Don't litter. Keep your home and office organized and orderly. Find time to go to the mountains and equal time to be on the beach. Serve the elderly. Talk to God out loud, whenever and wherever. Do good. Call your mother. Kiss your sweetie goodnight. 

Best of luck in all you do. 

Name the One by One

It is interesting the feelings I have on gratitude and the experiences that have contributed to my understanding. I have a tendency to say woe is me and feel bad for not being validated or assured I am doing good to all men. Sometimes I feel like I "do everything" with no return. I have really had to submit myself to the Lord and learn how to be alright with His validation, being happy and satisfied knowing that He is pleased with the work I do. I am trying to get to the point where I don't need people telling me how great of a job I am doing, and just being at peace knowing that Heavenly Father loves me and is aware of my heart and the things I am trying to do. I also feel like my need to be more grateful to Him and others can be in my willingness to be positive, uplifting, and motivating. I have some things to work on!

Willingness

I was given the challenge by my mission president to develop the kind of faith that could move mountains. I didn't realize how difficult it actually is to develop a kind of faith that can work mighty miracles. From what I have read of Paul and the feelings I have had about faith I really have had one distinct impression and that is the difference of faith and belief. Right now I am finishing up a science class and have studied the scientific process so thoroughly that I have a pretty good handle on what belief is. Belief is grabbing hold on truth that has been demonstrated and proven to be true. It could be proven through multiple witness', artifacts, research and science consensus. What I am learning and LOVING about faith is that extends beyond the human's capacity to believe and there is a relinquishing of will and then faith is there. It is our willingness to come unto Christ, to do as He asks, and testify of the truth we find in the world. So many people feel like, if they can't say they know with 100% of who they are, they are alienated from a class of people who say they walk in truth. I believe that Heavenly Father is aware of what we know, what we believe, and what we are willing to act on. It is in our acting on His word that will enable us to truly understand His work and words.

Being of One Mind

There are so many instances in the scriptures that  we, today, can relate to our own lives. When Paul speaks to Phillipians he counsels the people to "be like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind." (Phil 2:2) This counsel alone could be the resolution to a lot of turmoil members of the church face. I live in a ward with so many different people, a portion are of pioneer heritage, holding strong to their lineage and making sure other members know that their ancestors built the building we congregate in, and the houses we live in. A handful of members are new converts, returning members, or neighbors seeking welfare assistance. Another portion of the ward are members who are free thinkers, sometimes termed as "intellects" who have either found comradery with each other or have made quick enemies with those more conservative than they. I have found myself in a more neutral position hoping that the Spirit will direct me in where I should voice my opinions in regards to the gospel. I have also felt a slight pull to protect the underdogs or those who seem to not feel support when they make a comment, even if their comment seems off-color or not normal. Usually I don't even agree, but like Paul, I have a strong testimony of the importance of letting "nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves" (vs.3). I feel like this principle is so vital to the success of the Church but also the success of humanity. Being able to accept that each of us are different, misfitted, and peculiar  will set us free of hate, discord, and pride. It will allow us to be exalted together, being able to glean from each other reasons to know better, to do better, and to be better. Being able to turn to the scriptures to receive greater light in regards to our personal challenges has always been one of the best results of scripture study. Although these are ancient writings, they are really applicable to to what we face as human beings today. "Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others." (vs.4) Why else would we be here on Earth together?

Creative Cat

I LOVED Yunus' speech on creating a poverty-free world. The idea that every human is born with a potential to create something that will better the world and make society a greater place to be is amazing. It's an idea that really , if the world grabbed hold, we would live in a place that would be motivated by doing good to all men continually. I really felt impressed to seek out people who run for government offices who promote this idea of creating a world that is more financially stable and eliminate the poverty levels. I live in the heart of downtown Salt Lake City and I am surrounded by people who are "poor", but not only are they financially struggling, they are poor in spirit. They succumb to the social demographic that has labeled them unworthy to participate in a world that would thrive with their input. Instead of nourishing their ability to become, they fill the bodies with substances that contain them and keep them in their state of regression. I want to make the world better.

We're All in This Together

This week wasn't as thought provoking as it usually goes. I think the main reason is the fact that I have already decided how I want my family to be involved with starting a company. We are always trying to come up with ways our family to do business together. Whether it is a garage sale, selling stickers, or working on a shaved ice shack. We just want to do things together so our children learn to value hard work, discipline, and have a healthy money sense. We like being together when things are successful or when they fail so that we can all relate and share how we feel. I suppose my biggest thought this week is the understanding I have of how important my kids are and making sacrifices so that they can be happy and our home can thrive and function.

What is Baptism?

I love that we have a gospel full of symbols. We have baptism that represents a burial, a newness of life, and a resurrection to be made whole. Paul really helps elucidates this idea of having our lives revived through our commitment to the Savior. I ask myself, what does it feel like to be new? Baptism enables us to walk in a newness of life. I instantly thought of the love I have of moving into a new home. I love moving into a new house. We find a home we like, upgrade the inside to feel fresh, clean, and modern and then we move our old life into this new home and change all vignettes and facets that don't really work in the new home like they did in a previous home. A lot changes and it can be hard on our family, but once they get used to the efficiency and effectiveness of this new life, things seem to function more peacefully and smooth. It is like that when we are baptized and when we renew those covenants through baptism. It is our willingness to "move into a new home", allow ourselves to adjust to the changes that have been made, and learn to enjoy this new way of life.  I think about my kids when they are forced into new homes and have to start all over with their systems of life. Once they really commit to the idea of life changing, they commit to always learning, observing and evaluating their feelings, there is constant growth, and a darling submissiveness to change. Baptism is that for me. This constant regard to our need to progress in new spiritual atmospheres. Even within the covenant of baptism we are expected to change constantly. We are asked to fulfill callings, follow promptings of the Spirit, and continually fuel or spirits with the things of Heaven. I love the concept and the continuance this principle offers.   

The Impact of an Example

I love how what I am learning in class is always coinciding with what is going on in my little world. Reading in Corinthians about Paul and his conviction in being an Apostle of the Lord was really interesting, but it didn't impact me as deeply until I had a conversation with my sister in law about the calling of an Apostle and how they handle all the people who don't agree with how they run the church. I shared an experience of a woman I was with after a session of general conference. The subject of discussion was one of the Apostle's talks and she shared how she disagreed with what he said and then finished her comment with, "He is such an idiot." My stomach sank, I felt really bothered and tried my best to smooth out the situation and stand for what I know to be true about the apostles. When I shared the experience with my sister in law we both just bore testimony to each other of the validity in the church's organization of having Apostles who "are fools for Christ's sake." Paul even goes so far as illustrating how the people of Corinth believe they are better than the servants called of God. They profess to have more knowledge, and strength than the apostles. I shared this reference because we tend to think things are so different today then they were in biblical times, and yet here Paul is expressing the same tender, but bold feelings about his calling as an Apostle. I have heard people say horrible things about the Apostles, things you would never say about someone you actually know and love. I am a firm believer that although men are weak and have their faults or their opinions may seem outdated, it doesn't change the fact that the Lord has chosen them to be His mouthpiece. I love the Apostles. I love that not only by studying their words do we learn more about who they are and there testimony of the Savior, but we learn who Christ is and what He deems important. The gospel is amazing. It is a driving force in a world that wishes it wasn't. It is strong and resilient, bold and fulfilling.

Dream a Little Dream

This week's lesson I really gained a deeper perspective in chasing after even the smallest dreams. I have found that my dreams aren't too elaborate. I want to live an abundant life. I  want a simple home, I want a good career, and my husband to be successful. After reading and reviewing The Dip I also realized my renewed energy toward not giving up, but knowing it is important to change and look for opportunities to grow. I really like being a able to better understand how simple life can be and how my choices effect my attitude and behavior. I like knowing that the gospel interlaces it's way through these concepts and allows for further light and knowledge.

We Are The Dreamers of The Dreams

This week has been pretty cool as far as reflections go. I really have made some pretty huge resolves as to how I imagine our life will be like once we are more established and out of school. I don't want money to be our family motivator although anything money at this point is a motivator for two poor college students with two sons. HA! I really want to discuss with my husband the importance of us talking about where we want to be and how we want to get here. Sometimes we get so caught up in the busy schedule that we forget to take time to evaluate and inventory what our life is like and if it is taking us in the direction we want to go. I really like the concept of not quitting, like Seth Godin has been teaching me. It is such a great principle to know when it is appropriate to give up something and when holding on for dear life is all that matters. I am grateful for that perspective and the opportunity I have to take a class like this that is so motivating and full of self-discovery.

Contribution

I feel like ever since I started taking this class I am a lot more committed to the idea of starting my own company and getting all my ducks in a row. Although I have been heavily saturated in business talk, I appreciate the dose of spiritual enlightenment. Anytime I read a talk from The Holland's I really feel so at peace with the world and where my life is going, even when things seem crazy. It is helpful to hear that things work out and that no matter how long and hard the road may get, it will be worth it as long as we are doing our best to become like the Savior. Our success in this life matters the the Lord, and though He may not care specifically about what career we choose or where we live, He cares that we enjoy the ride and contribute to this world that is in massive need of contribution. It is our duty as His children to bolster and create so that we can benefit from an exciting world of development, change, conflict, sacrifice, and faith. The gospel amazes me!

"Who Are You", Said The Caterpillar.

This week's lessons have been really fun for me. I honestly feel a pull towards wanting to take a chance on the entrepreneurial journey and see if my passions can take our family some place. I have really enjoyed getting to know myself. I feel super vulnerable in this class because I have to lay out all my so called secrets and navigate which ones are worth acting on. I enjoy being able to have the Spirit guide me in my efforts to seek and find. I am grateful for the understanding I have that Heavenly Father wants me to give myself to Him and once I do that He doesn't mind what goals I reach for. (I still am thinking about Jan Newman's talk). I am anxious to see if who I think I am and who I want to be will end up being the same. It is interesting to learn how important it is to really understand who you are. I have always felt pressure that I need to know right now who I am so I can be an adult and do adultish things, but really that is all part of this journey. It is in our experience of learning that we gather bits and pieces of who we are and that will then lead us down a road full of twists and turns. The further down we get the more prepared we are to accomplish greater good.

Toiling Upward in the Night

It is interesting how sometimes the lessons for this class end up being life lessons the Lord needs me to learn in order to more fully progress. This week was yet another gentle reminder of the importance of discovering and remembering who I am in order to fulfill my divine role here on Earth. In Jan Newman's speech, he spoke of how the Lord doesn't really care how much money we make or what we do for our job as long as we are tending to our stewardship. I really appreciated that comment because sometimes I lose that perspective when really, the work I am doing within in home and the ward I am in is sufficient for the Lord. In contrast, but also support to this, N. Eldon Tanner really stabilized the importance of obedience and how when we are obedient and work for the Lord first, we are promised many blessings. Financial stability, happiness, peace of mind, endurance, and confidence are all promises that I will hold tight to in order to make life enjoyable and worthwhile. What an exceptional life we have been granted! Although it is difficult to sift through experience that propel us upward and those that send us adrift, we can be sure that the Lord is aware of our plight in figuring out who we are, because once we really know, once the self- realization kicks in, we become part of His plan! We become partakers of the bread of life and get to experience the joys of leading, and guiding, and walking beside a world that desperately needs goodness and those who know who they are. This week's lesson really helped me recognize the importance of working with the Lord to dixcover what it is I am to be.

Just like the movies

I am learning, especially this week how my vision of the future is pretty romanced. I have these big ideas of great things. Sometimes my husband thinks I am too big of a dreamer, but I honestly feel like what I imagine life to be like in ten years can be that way. I feel so strongly about it, but I feel so strongly about my ability to make it happen. I am a put your shoulder to the wheel woman and when I want something I go for it. Sometimes things don't work out like I plan, and I try to take that in stride. I am getting better than I used to be about accepting failure or setback. When I was younger it threw me for a loop, but the more I learn about the Savior and His plan, the more I realize how imperative it is to keep an eye single to His glory and let life happen. I think my plan I spoke of in my mentor session is beautiful and I want it badly. I have married someone that will make my dream realistic and doable for him and we can go places with it! I love feeling excited about the future and planning even if it doesn't work out exactly how I imagine. I know the Lord is aware of me and my desire to do good continually so I trust that the effort I put into creating my own dream life won't go unnoticed and He will help us get there.

Measuring My Life

This class has been such an eye opener for me. It has really helped me gain greater insight into who I am as I think about articles and books I have read. I love that there is still a lot of great people in the world trying to motivate others to be more great. I get overwhelmed with how busy and frantic the world is when really I can slow down and focus on progress and the service of others. I am at a place in my life that there is a need for change. I have been the same Jaclyn for a long time and I feel like the Lord is telling me it is time to move upward, to be uncomfortable, and to start changing. Usually I would kick against such a notion, but what I am learning here in class is to gladly accept the invitation to be a better human, to contribute more, and make a name for myself. I love that the gospel is all encompassing in that, we can apply great principles taught by the Savior to our business ideas, careers, and livelihood. I love that there is a way to balance family life and leisure, hard work and discipline, and gaining knowledge and communing with God. Such a cool plan!

"It emerges."

In The Start Up of You, Hoffman says, "Your identity doesn't get found, It emerges." This week I have been really interested in the developing of self or rather the discovery of who is really inside this lady. The articles and assignments have really had my focus concentrated on the importance of developing skills and having values that while enable a wonderful person in many aspects of life emerge. 

I really connected with Sister Dew's talk about integrity and her fierceness in stressing how important it is to honest and strengthening the ability to be accountable and and trustworthy. She quotes "President Boyd K. Packer said this:

The world is spiraling downward at an ever-quickening pace. I am sorry to tell you that it will not get better. I know of nothing in the history of the Church or in the history of the world to compare with our present circumstances. Nothing happened in Sodom and Gomorrah which exceeds the wickedness and depravity which surrounds us now....The first line of defense–the home–is crumbling. Surely you can see what the adversary is about. We are now exactly where the prophets warned we would be (Boyd K. Packer, BYU J. Reuben Clark Law Society Devotional, 28 February 2004)."

This quote made the urgency to develop who I am so much more real and vital. We no longer have time to not take immediate action in aspiring, setting goals, and accomplishing. This week's assignments really impressed me that in order to be successful in a world that is "spiraling downward" is to focus my attention upwards. Developing, changing, and progressing to become who I was up there so that person can make society and the environment I live in better. Kind of exciting right?!

Begin with the End in Mind

This week has been an interesting one. I went out of town to visit with my family in Colorado and have had to juggle school and family life. I had read The Last Lecture right before I had my first baby so it was nice to have a little refresher course. What an amazing example of making sure you lived your very best life and taught what you deemed most important for your kids. I love dreaming. I think it is essential for a person's sanity to have dreams and I think it more essential for a person's confidence to accomplish big dreams. I am a firm believer of the "as a man thinketh" concept and it's relativity to our success in this life. What we think really is who we are and training our minds to think big and better can be a challenge. It is just as hard to think positively and have a good affect ont hose around us, but it is possible. I always think of Willy Wonka and his extraordinary ability to teach children that dreams are possible. They are what make this world beautiful. They create stories of ordinary people doing extraordinary things and those things motivate others to do great things. Dreams create good in the world and happiness in a world full of turmoil.

All Humans Are Entrepreneurs

The art of creating has really been the thought that has remained in my mind this week as I have tried to think about what I have been learning. I am in this weird place in my life where I am sifting through experiences and trying to invent my own personal "rules of living" that Hoffman and Casnocha refer to. Before you embark on what you are going to do for the rest of your life, you have to create who that person will be and how that person will exist. As a mother, I am also recognizing the importance of being consistent to what you want to create and really putting your faith into those ideas. I love the concept of improving the society around you because it really illustrates the need to focus your ideas and what you want to creat within yourself to make your environment better. You need the desire to enhance what is around so that you can be successful. I am excited to have resources that can help me hone in on who I am and how I can contribute to the world I live in. I am excited to have a structured way of expressing myself and enabling the Spirit to help me recognize what it is I am going to be when I grow up.